Thursday, January 26, 2012

By the way... (Passport Fun)

This is going to play out right here on C.B.S., step by step.  It's news-worthy to a degree.

I recently applied for a passport.  I have no privacy whatsoever and various occurrences in my life over the past few years make it abundantly clear that there is nothing the United States federal government doesn't know about me.  I applied with an official copy of my Ohio Birth Certificate and a California Driver's License a Post Office Clerk made a photocopy of.  Nevertheless, I received this reply:

I should have used a flash, but you can read it.  This came with it:

The mailing also included a 5-page "Supplemental Worksheet" asking for every place I've ever lived, worked, or gone to school, and for my immediate family memebers' names.  I already started filling it out, so I'm not going to post it.  When I got it, I called the number provided and the kid who answered acted like he wasn't familiar with the letter and asked me to read it aloud to him.  I did.  Obviously, they record these calls and can use that recording as proof that I received the letter should the need to do so arise.  Why else would he ask me to read it?  Somehow, the friendly folks at the U.S. government got my name wrong, too.  Of course, it's easy to see how a C can be mistaken for a G, but I think the name was on the application 4 or 5 times including my parents' names in addition to being very clearly printed out on the birth certificate and the driver's license.  And, of course, I know damn well they know my name.  Maybe this is all quite normal, but the day before I got it, some  guy lookin' all sharp and acting slightly nervous (He must be new.) walked by me and made the comment, "Sorry to cut you off."  Once in a while, people stand behind me somewhere and make comments about how great my life could be and of course, occasionally threaten to prevent me from obtaining employment.  Fascinating.  Just fascinating.

Stay tuned.


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